Confessions of a (former?) binge eater

Confession time people: I have been bingeing 😦 this is soooo bad. Like not as bad as I used to do, and not completely mindless shoving food in my face kind of thing, but definitely not “mindful eating”. In case you don’t know what that is, mindful eating is where you think about what you are eating, you savour your food and appreciate each bite. By doing this you are aware of how much you are eating, when you get full and whether you actually enjoyed your food. It’s both satisfying and effective to control portions.

In the last few days I have gone from portioning out my food super carefully, weighing and measuring everything, to plopping on the couch and eating ice cream straight from the tub. No I didn’t finish the tub in a sitting or anything crazy, but I don’t actually know how much I ate, nor was I doing my usual slow savouring of the ice cream. I also inhaled far too much Smartfood popcorn while watching a movie or 2 straight from the bag… noticing a theme?

Vice #1

When you don’t put things in a bowl or on a plate, you don’t give yourself a portion. You don’t give yourself that automatic stopping point where you have to think… do I really want more? Instead, you just mindlessly stick your hand back in the bag and shove your cheddar covered fingerfulls of glorious popcorn in your face. (I have a problem… I know).

I have been using the fact that I did the competition as an excuse to randomly add calorie laden things to food. I am putting cheese on things that don’t need cheese, sugar instead of sweetener and cream instead of milk in my coffee, I got whipped cream on my Starbucks, and I put an extra dollop of honey on my yogurt bowl in the morning. These things don’t add significant joy to my taste buds, they’re just me being crazy because I’m finally not restricted… this is not a healthy way to look at things! I wouldn’t have done those things before the contest prep, so why would I do them now?

Bad Rose! Very bad Rose! On the bright side… I am acknowledging it, and I’m stopping it. Instantly. Not tomorrow, not after the weekend… NOW! Because that is what you have to do. You cannot let yourself fall into the trap of “I’ll diet tomorrow” because then you (or at least I) will want to shove your pie-hole full of every calorie dense food you can get your hands on while you are still “allowed”.

After I had this realization last night I made a plan, because that’s what I do, I plan, and list and write things down, and then I don’t follow it, but it makes me feel better. ok?

This November is packed full of events on the weekends and a lot of people want to do dinner now that I’m out of hiding so to speak, so my general plan is:

  1. Get back to eating good high protein, low-ish carb meals and healthy fats 4-6 times per day
  2. Go to the gym 3-4 times per week focusing on heavy lifting and moderate amounts of cardio
  3. Limit alcohol to 2 times per week (preferably 1 time, but there is the wine and food show and my boyfriends birthday, so I’m being realistic)
  4. Choose healthy options at restaurants and don’t order dessert “just because”
  5. Don’t have treats at home, if I am going out to dinner or drinks with someone, that is fine, but no eating treats all by myself!

That’s it, nothing crazy, I’m not going back on a “diet” I’m just trying to remind myself to be good to my body. Make healthy choices and live my life in a healthy way.

Changing gears here: last night I made Red Snapper with Bacon tossed baby bok choy and zucchini. It was heavenly… bacon makes everything better. I cooked up some bacon first, drained off a little fat and put a little in another fry pan. I then cooked the snapper in the small amount of bacon grease, and sauteed the zucchini and bok choy in the pan the bacon was in. When the veggies were done, I added back the bacon all chopped up and tossed it all together. It was spectacularly flavourful.

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